In My Mind Holden Caulfield Was Hot

When I was a kid, I often developed crushes on fictional characters. I totally forgot about it until today when I confessed to Copyboy at Not Worth Mentioning that his blog/screen name was "cute." 

The thing is, I know Jesse, kinda. I mean, I don't "know him, know him"...  We send each other emails throughout the day comparing blog notes, comments and follower tips.  I know him enough that he actually let me "friend him" on Facebook. So it's not like I've formed this fake image to go along with his blog the way I've done with other bloggers who don't post their photo on their blog profiles. 

There's just something about his blog name that's hot-ish. I guess I can compare it to names like Ben and Adam are too.  I have no way of explaining this other than I had several crushes on stars and kids in school who were named Ben and Adam.

Here's the deal. When I was a kid, I'd read a book and fall in love with different guys in the story. I know you must be thinking of these cheesy lover types from Harlequin romance books. No! Not that type. These were just everyday dudes with sexy names. Some were even cartoon characters - I know you might be thinking, "Well those anime chicks are smokin' hot." Really, that's not the same thing ... Those chicks are designed for hotness. 

The very first crush I developed on a fictitious character was Christopher Robin of Winnie-the-Pooh. I didn't know he was based upon A.A. Milne's real life child! He too was adorable. As an adult, not so much, but that's okay.  Photos here: A Brief History of Winnie-the-Pooh.

In junior high, I became obsessed with Steven King. I had to read everything I could get my hands on. I discovered the book Different Seasons. The book includes several short stories and the one I was most sucked into was called The Body. I fell in love with Chris and Gordie. 

Gordie was a bit like me. We shared a love of writing and storytelling, however, something about Chris Chambers was incredibly hot. At first it was his name. To this day, I love last names like Anderson, Chase and Blake. Names people can pronounce and spell and don't react with, "Oh you're a pisan!" when you tell them your last name ends in an "I".

Maybe it was because he was from a troubled home and I wanted to help make things better for him. I'm not quite sure what it was really. One thing I do remember is that I imagined Chris looking much like River Phoenix who later portrayed him in Stand By Me-- obviously the movie version of the novella. I remember my reaction upon learning he had landed the role while flipping through an issue of Tiger Beat or Teen Beat. I was like, "No way, he totally looks like the Chris Chambers in my mind!"

In high school we read Catcher In The Rye. I loved the book, but to be honest, I don't remember much about it now. Maybe I should re-read it. I'm sure my blogger bud, Nikki would be all, "Yes, yes, re-read it!" Nikki has this awesome blog, Are you there youth? It's me, Nikki based upon young adult fiction she scores online for cheap. She reads and reviews all of these cool books we loved as teens and preteens.

Anyway, I had such a crush on Holden. I knew he had to be super cute. I imagined him preppy but like sloppy preppy, tousled hair and smoking cigs (something I never did nor did any of my straight-laced friends). He was angry and something about that was attractive. He was hurting, again very attractive quality in a young man. 

And on that note, yes I fell in love with every character in The Outsiders, but unfortunately my view was tainted having seen the movie before reading the book. I already knew Pony Boy and Soda Pop were my guys. Oh Tommy Howell, how I loved you and your character and your character's older bro, Rob Lowe.