Thursday, May 27, 2010

The Andy Gibb Doll AKA Worst Christmas Gift Ever

At first I wanted to title this blog post, "The Andy Gibb Doll, AKA Worst Gift Ever" then remembered the two re-gifted items we received at our wedding. The gift-giver was kind enough to leave the Bloomingdale's tags on them for easy return. However, because the items were four years old--which coincidentally dated back to gift-giver's wedding--the item decreased in value and was only worth $4.

Anyway, I know 'tis not the season to be talking Christmas, but I had to get this off my chest. Like now.

Adam Rich from Eight is Enough
Today one of my close friends stated on Facebook that Andy Gibb was her very first crush. Truth be told, like Rick Springfield, he was much too old for me. That year I was sweating Adam Rich from Eight is Enough pretty hardcore and didn't have time for Andy. Don't get me wrong, I loved the Bee Gees just like every good '70s child, but didn't want to marry 'em.

It must have been Christmas of 1979. I was 7. We were celebrating Christmas Eve at Great Aunt Cee's house way up in Mountainside, New Jersey--a long, cold ride for a little kid from Long Island. She had a big, fancy, suburban home with an awesome basement bar and possibly even a disco ball. I would run around wild, downing ShopRite orange soda and stuffing my face with antipasto. It was great fun.

Aside from the glorious food, my second favorite perk of the holiday festivities were the gifts. The tree was surrounded by beautifully wrapped presents and a handful of them were for me. I counted the minutes to receive my two or three items. Seriously, I waited all night for them.

What did I unveil that Christmas, 1979? A damn Andy Gibb doll! There sat plastic Andy, staring at me from his shiny blue box, donning pink and white and his trademark winged 'do. What the what? I wasn't into Andy Gibb! I remember crying to my mom, "A BOY DOLL! WHAT THE HECK AM I GONNA DO WITH A BOY DOLL?!"

I loved Barbies, Baby Alive and Monchhichi. None of those items were under the tree with my name attached to it. Nope, I went home sulking in the backseat of our '77 Cutlass toting a horrible Andy Gibb doll. Too bad I didn't hold on to that crappy doll. It fetches a pretty penny on eBay today. 

39 comments:

Ms. A said...

I thought Andy was kinda cute. The doll was just creepy!

Babes Mami said...

I've never heard of this guy but doll = creepo :]

RMb said...

hahahahaha, oh ebay. what a heartless bitch.

side note: as only someone made in the 80s (who married a man from the 70s) can point out: andy gibb is chest hair-a-licious! so i love the inadvertent pun you made by pointing out that you needed to get this off your chest. ;)

Anonymous said...

my sister LOVED Andy Gibb, but she is 12 years older than I am and age appropriate for her. She'd probably flip over that doll! lol

Bossy Betty said...

SCARY!!!

Alison said...

Maybe it's better you don't have that doll anymore. His pants/hair/shirt/smile are creepy as hell.

I can picture him starring in a slasher spin-off from Toy Story. Clips on YouTube would show him lurking behind the toy box waiting for Barbie to let her guard down. I'm putting too much thought into it...

Cheeseboy said...

That doll is so, uh... yeah.

Marlene said...

But he kinda looked like a girl doll, didn't he?

TS Hendrik said...

This post scares the BeeGees out of me.

Sara Louise said...

That chest hair is freaking me out

Morgan said...

Wow! Great story! I would've cried too...with tears of joy. I know, I'm a nerd.

Pat Tillett said...

the most massively bell bottomed doll in history, me things...

ScoMan said...

Hahahaha The things they make into toys. It's incredible really.

Andy Gibb Doll = not necessary
Dexter Bobble Head = Not only necessary, but a must have.

Powdered Toast Man said...

Better than a lump of coal.

Kalei's Best Friend said...

Andy Gibb doll? hmmm Victoria Principle had the real thing..lol...omg, I feel old in 1973 i was 18... lol

mamahasspoken said...

I would have loved an Andy doll in 1979. Of course I was a college student and my dorm room was full of pictures of the current eye candy. He would have fitted in nicely ;o)

1950s Atomic Ranch House said...

*ick* did the doll come with it's own chest rug too? Har!

Rebekah said...

These are my favorite kind of posts of yours. Your storytelling is beautiful and then...WHAMMO! Bee Gees in a box! LOL

Copyboy said...

I thought all little girls love men with a thick nest of chest hair. Based on my theory you should of REALLY wanted a Tom Selleck doll.

Maggi said...

Andy was totally cute...the doll, not so much. I remember being disappointed like that. I wanted a Cabbage Patch doll and instead my Granny gave me a "homemade" Cabbage Patch doll, she was U-G-L-Y. LOL Actually, I think I still have her somewhere around here!

leigh hewett said...

It pains me to think of the crap that I let go of over the years. I'd be so rich.

But...I would have been pissed too if I got that doll.

Tracie said...

I liked Andy Gibb but wasn't crushing on him in '79. (I was 9 yrs old.) I'm trying to remember who I was into but I'm coming up blank.

pika23 said...

Andy was a hottie...I remember thinking he was cute, I saw him on Punky Brewster a couple times when he guest starred.

My first doll I got of a childhood crush was my LJN Michael Jackson doll...which I still have, fully clothed with accessories and on his stand.

Second, was my New kids on the block dolls! I had them all!

I remember they debuted in October of 90...and my grandma had seen them at the mall and was gonna save it til christmas, but for some reason or other gave it to me early! I freak freak freaked out!!!!!!!

I would gaze at him and twirl his little pony tail thing...I got the rest of the gang for christmas.

Melissa said...

Oh my GOD. Does he have a button on the back that plays "I Just Want To Be Your Everything" or was that technology still being developed? :P

Tiffany Kadani said...

Was not a disco girl at all. In fact, dolls in general are creepy. Eek.

Salt said...

That chest hair is terrifying!!!! Did the doll come with that also?

Joann Mannix said...

Sorry I haven't been around so much, honey. Working on the novel. As an oldster, I remember Andy Gibb quite vividly. He was a cutie, but still, giving a kid an Andy Gibb doll? Totally random and weird. Boy dolls were never anything to get excited over. One was all that was required to be a husband for Barbie. And honestly, my sisters and I hated the Ken dolls. We used my brother's GI Joes for the men.

Andy Gibb doll, so weird.

Macey said...

Haha! I saw him last night on AI.
Hey, at least the doll didn't have that chest hair from HELL!

sara said...

Is it wrong that I really want to have the Andy Gibb doll marry my Barbie...screw you Ken!

Angie said...

Do you think he's worth less since you took him out of the package? Regardless, I want one now.

liz said...

What a crappy Christmas. I would have been bummed, too.

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

I also thought Andy was a bit dreamy, but that doll gives me the creeps a little bit!!

Heather Taylor said...

Oh this is so sad. Even worse is that the name Andy Gibb doesn't even sound familiar to me.

Heather said...

I can't believe you didn't have the foresight to save that for the fortune you could get on EBay.

Why oh why did I destroy the Star Wars action figures I got one year.

Lindsey Buck said...

Ooooh assaulted by chest hair! Ha when I was little I was always desperate for a new boy doll. I had too many girls and they were all lonely. :)

Vicky said...

Okay that is just too funny! I had no idea they even made one :)

Meg said...

I didn't even realise they'd made a doll of Andy Gibb...didn't he kill himself not long after?

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Ew! I do agree with the others about his grotesquely hairy chest. Never had a thing for him, but I did crush on the hot oldest bro on Eight is Enough, played by Grant Goodeve (or something like that. I was so in love, I kept his name in my memory bank all these, uh, decades.) Little Adam was cute too, but too young for me.
xoRobyn

California Keys said...

I hear it's not worth anything unless you have the Barry and Robin dolls to accompany the Andy doll....

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